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There\u2019s a\u00a0long and hilarious history\u00a0(dating back to Aristotle) of adults complaining about new trends and worrying about kids.<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t want to be that guy. I\u2019m enthusiastic about the whole world moving online and the\u00a0benefits of remote work. I believe we can push forward as a society, gradually getting better and kinder.<\/p>\n
But I also witness how our current society rewards certain toxic behaviors. And this is especially true for those who spend a lot of time online.<\/p>\n
Let\u2019s talk about those traits we\u2019d be better off without.<\/p>\n
1. Repression<\/strong> For example, take the fear of death. It used to be a natural part of life as several generations lived together and helped each other out. But over time, we\u2019ve all become distant from each other. COVID-19 really brought home how much we\u2019ve been avoiding topics like sickness, aging, and also grief and death.<\/p>\n Once we stop repressing our fear,\u00a0we can start accepting it. We can stop living our lives as though we are immortal. Without repression, we can embrace the day instead. Isn\u2019t that so much better than constantly fleeing from our own feelings?<\/p>\n 2. Shallowness<\/strong> Do we really need to know about what\u2019s going on in the world every day? Keep tabs on which celebrities date whom? Watch the latest hot show on Netflix and forget about it the next day?<\/p>\n We know that Fear of Missing Out\u00a0leads to\u00a0increased loneliness and depression. But it\u2019s still hard to break out of that need to know everything. Nobody wants to look silly in a dinner conversation, and we\u2019re also tempted to try to one-up people with our collection of useless facts. So we\u2019ve developed a thirst for shallow information and entertainment.<\/p>\n I\u2019m not saying we should all start reading classics by candlelight (as peaceful as that sounds). But there\u2019s much to be gained about enjoying books and movies with more substance. When I put in that kind of effort, it fills up a void I\u2019m not aware of usually, and my FOMO fades away.<\/p>\n 3. Intellectual Arrogance<\/strong> To be fair, there\u2019s a lot of information out there, and it\u2019s hard for anyone to navigate. I keep thinking about that one Noam Chomsky quote:<\/p>\n \u201cYou can\u2019t expect somebody to become a biologist by giving them access to the Harvard University biology library and saying, \u201cJust look through it.\u201d That will give them nothing. The internet is the same, except magnified enormously.\u201d There\u2019s no easy answer to the problem of finding good information, but a bit of intellectual humility would go a long way. As Epictetus said:<\/p>\n \u201cBe content to appear stupid or clueless in extraneous matters. Don\u2019t wish to seem knowledgeable \u2014 and if some regard you as important, distrust yourself.\u201d 4. An Addiction to Anger<\/strong> Anger is a poisonous emotion. It is also very easy to redirect. You\u2019re angry at yourself, at your boss or your spouse, or the life circumstances you\u2019re stuck in. But you don\u2019t want to actually deal with any of that, so you direct all your anger on some topic that doesn\u2019t affect you at all.<\/p>\n Now you\u2019re thinking, \u201cBut Eric! There\u2019s so much injustice in the world, why shouldn\u2019t I get angry about it?\u201d<\/p>\n Sure, that\u2019s true. But are you using your anger to\u00a0really\u00a0help anything? Or are you just indulging in it because it makes you feel important? It\u2019s an adrenaline rush, getting to yell at somebody online, especially when you get to feel righteous about it too.<\/p>\n 5. Cruelty<\/strong> The story was infuriating. Now there\u2019s that adrenaline rush I was talking about just now \u2014 I succumb to it too sometimes!<\/p>\n But it was also a good example of the casual cruelty that\u2019s becoming standard today. We\u2019re treating other people as expendable.<\/p>\n Is it good for any kid to have all their moments recorded and shared online?\u00a0Nope.\u00a0But parents do it anyway, and they don\u2019t care about the consequences.<\/p>\n It\u2019s not just parents who are prey to this. There\u2019s been\u00a0a rise in animal cruelty\u00a0perpetuated for likes and views. Sometimes, people don\u2019t even realize they\u2019re abusing the animal \u2014 they\u2019re simply ignorant and don\u2019t stop to think about what they\u2019re doing.<\/p>\n That\u2019s not even getting into how badly we treat each other. Social media\u00a0increases narcissism\u00a0and decreases compassion, and it seems to be getting worse each year. Cruelty is rewarded with engagement and attention \u2014 and we\u2019re increasingly desperate for both.<\/p>\n Is There a Solution?<\/strong><\/em> All we can do is try to maintain some clarity. Avoid time-wasters, disengage from the outrage, and step away from stupid arguments.<\/p>\n My personal motto is:\u00a0Cut the crap.\u00a0That\u2019s what I tell myself when I notice I\u2019m being dishonest (toward others, and more importantly toward myself).<\/p>\n As long as I can hold on to who I am, I think I\u2019ll be fine.<\/p>\n Mostly.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" There\u2019s a\u00a0long and hilarious history\u00a0(dating back to Aristotle) of adults complaining about new trends and worrying about kids. 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\nSometimes we pretend that self-repression is a thing of the past. Many old social taboos are gone, but that doesn\u2019t always mean we understand ourselves well.<\/p>\n
\nThe world has sped up we can all agree that that\u2019s true. It\u2019s impacting the way we treat each other and the things we think about.<\/p>\n
\nBeing shallow about art isn\u2019t the worst thing in the world. It\u2019s far more worrying that people take the same approach to the news. Instead of looking at what\u2019s true and important, we often notice only the flashiest, most shocking news items.<\/p>\n
\nWe have never had this much access to knowledge\u2026 and people are sinking into willful ignorance at alarming rates. Many fall for conspiracy theories, while others latch onto their favorite pundit\u2019s opinions and refuse to hear other viewpoints.<\/p>\n
\nDon\u2019t fall for easy answers and don\u2019t pretend you understand things you don\u2019t. The only way to gain knowledge is to stop showing off and\u00a0do your own research. Even more importantly, work on your self-knowledge. That way, you won\u2019t fall prey to grifters.<\/p>\n
\nWhile we\u2019re at it, we need to work on\u00a0our emotional resilience. It\u2019s all too easy to fall for a herd mentality, especially when it comes to strong emotion. I keep watching people get swept up in a tidal wave of outrage, and sometimes I\u2019m tempted to do the same.<\/p>\n
\nIf you haven\u2019t heard of Myka Stauffer, she\u2019s a Youtuber who gained notoriety last year after she and her husband\u00a0\u201cre-homed\u201d a child\u00a0she had adopted from China. The little boy was autistic, and the Stauffers decided they didn\u2019t want to have him in their family anymore. It probably didn\u2019t help that he wasn\u2019t as easy to film as their other children. Myka kept getting frustrated with him for ruining her brand as a parenting influencer.<\/p>\n
\nI don\u2019t think there\u2019s an easy way to solve any of these problems. Social media isn\u2019t going anywhere, and the damage it\u2019s done is already here.<\/p>\n