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In almost every area of life\u00a0 from business to dating to politics\u00a0 the ability to assess someone\u2019s level of self-awareness is crucial.<\/p>\n
Because without self-awareness, it\u2019s unlikely that a person will have much emotional maturity. And the dangers of getting involved with someone who lacks emotional maturity should be obvious enough.<\/p>\n
If you want to develop an eye for spotting low self-awareness, train yourself to look for these seven signs.<\/p>\n
1. Never admitting mistakes<\/strong> When someone can\u2019t acknowledge even small mistakes, it suggests that they feel tremendous fear and inadequacy. Unfortunately, the same fear of external inspection also makes them afraid of self-reflection.<\/p>\n It\u2019s hard to be self-aware if you\u2019re unwilling to be vulnerable.<\/p>\n On the other hand, the willingness to admit to mistakes suggests mental toughness and emotional maturity. It suggests that you have the insight to understand that while mistakes are part of us, they don\u2019t define us.<\/p>\n To become more self-aware, then, requires the courage to be vulnerable on purpose. After all\u2026<\/p>\n How can you see within if you\u2019re not willing to open up?<\/p>\n \u201cGood judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.\u201d 2. Criticizing others<\/strong> When someone criticizes someone else for saying something dumb, they\u2019re implying that they\u2019re smart. Which feels good. When you\u2019re constantly trying to feel good about yourself there\u2019s no time left to learn about yourself.<\/p>\n But the real tragedy of hypercriticalness is its opportunity cost: All that time and energy spent trying to boost self-esteem often comes at the cost of being able to do the hard work of learning more about oneself and self-reflecting.<\/p>\n \u201cCriticism of others is thus an oblique form of self-commendation. We think we make the picture hang straight on our wall by telling our neighbors that all his pictures are crooked.\u201d 3. Avoiding hard decisions<\/strong> But how does that relate to self-awareness exactly?<\/p>\n Well, people who are self-aware tend to do a lot of psychological experimenting.Instead of just blindly accepting the thought that\u00a0others will think I\u2019m foolish if I speak up and voice my opinion, they test it out.<\/p>\n Self-aware people use data, not theories, to choose their actions.<\/p>\n On the other hand, when people lack self-awareness it often means that they simply accept whatever their mind tells them:<\/p>\n He\u2019ll get angry if you suggest a rom-com\u2026 Better just go with his suggestion for a movie. And if they can\u2019t do that, they become a slave to whatever passing thought or feeling happens to be present.<\/p>\n \u201cYou may delay, but time will not.\u201d 4. Being vague about their feelings<\/strong> Saying\u00a0I\u2019m just upset\u00a0feels less scary than saying\u00a0I feel sad. When you avoid expressing your feelings, you teach your mind that they are dangerous.<\/p>\n If someone is constantly running away from something \u2014 even their own feelings \u2014 it shouldn\u2019t be surprising when their mind interprets that thing as dangerous.<\/p>\n On the other hand, self-aware people understand that just because something\u00a0feels\u00a0bad doesn\u2019t mean it\u00a0is\u00a0bad.<\/p>\n Which means, they\u2019re much more likely to use plain language rather than overlyintellectual or vague terms to describe how they feel.<\/p>\n \u201cYou cannot swim for new horizons until you have courage to lose sight of the shore.\u201d 5. Worrying about the future<\/strong> And the problem with unproductive thinking is that it leads to all side effect and no benefit.<\/p>\n Worrying generates loads of anxiety and stress but never actually solves anything.<\/p>\n So why do so many people do it chronically? Why worry when the cost is so great and the benefit so small?<\/p>\n In short, because people lack self-awareness. They likely haven\u2019t taken the time to genuinely reflect on what worry is and how it works (or doesn\u2019t work) in our lives. Their mind just starts worrying and they go along with it, without pausing to investigate it and look at it questioningly and curiously.<\/p>\n Easier said than done, of course. But the more willing someone is to really look at and learn about their worry, the more likely they will be to let it go.<\/p>\n \u201cNever let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.\u201d 6. Ruminating on the past<\/strong> When people spend too much time ruminating and dwelling on past mistakes, losses, or failures, it can lead to tremendous emotional suffering with no upsideat all.<\/p>\n Without a high degree of self-awareness, it\u2019s easy to fall into spirals of rumination, though, because in the moment, it feels good.<\/p>\n Thinking gives the illusions of control.<\/p>\n And when people don\u2019t have the self-awareness and emotional maturity to face up to the uncontrollability of the past, ruminating on it makes them feel \u2014 temporarily \u2014 like they do have some control.<\/p>\n When people lack self-awareness about their tendency to want control things even when it\u2019s impossible, it frequently leads to the habit of rumination and all the emotional side effects that go with it \u2014 excessive shame, guilt, sadness, self-criticalness, and regret.<\/p>\n Reflect on past mistakes and losses. Accept them. But don\u2019t ruminate on them.<\/p>\n \u201cIf you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.\u201d 7. Only noticing loud emotions<\/strong> For example, after getting cut-off suddenly on the road while driving, they describe feeling \u201cmad a hell\u201d but aren\u2019t aware that they\u2019re also feeling afraid or guilty.<\/p>\n People with high self-awareness are able to see all their emotions, even the quiet ones.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In almost every area of life\u00a0 from business to dating to politics\u00a0 the ability to assess someone\u2019s level of self-awareness is crucial. Because without … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1749,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1748","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-psychology"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1748","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1748"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1748\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1750,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1748\/revisions\/1750"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1749"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1748"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1748"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1748"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nThe unwillingness to admit mistakes is often a sign of deep insecurity.<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 Rita Mae Brown<\/p>\n
\nHere\u2019s the thing about criticizing other people: It feels good. At least in the moment:<\/p>\n
\nWhen they criticize someone\u2019s taste in style or aesthetics, they\u2019re implying that they\u2019re sophisticated. Which feels good.
\nBut what does it say about someone if they have such a strong need to feel better about themselves that they have to criticize other people to do it?<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 Fulton J. Sheen<\/p>\n
\nBeing chronically indecisive usually means a lack of confidence and fear of being judged or making a mistake.<\/p>\n
\nI just don\u2019t feel very motivated. I\u2019ll work on it tomorrow.
\nWhen people chronically avoid hard decisions by being passive or procrastinating, for example, it\u2019s often a sign that they aren\u2019t willing to really look at their own mind objectively.<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 Benjamin Franklin<\/p>\n
\nIt may seem like a small thing, but the habit of describing feelings in overly vague or intellectual ways is often a subtle avoidance mechanism:<\/p>\n
\nSaying\u00a0I\u2019m just stressed\u00a0feels easier than saying\u00a0I\u2019m really angry right now, actually.
\nBut here\u2019s the thing\u2026<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 William Faulkner<\/p>\n
\nWorry is problem-solving that\u2019s applied to something in the future that either isn\u2019t a problem or is a problem that can\u2019t be solved by you at the moment. In other words, worry is unproductive thinking about the future.<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 Marcus Aurelius<\/p>\n
\nJust like worry is unproductive thinking about the future, rumination is unproductive thinking about the past.<\/p>\n
\n\u2015 Roy T. Bennett<\/p>\n
\nWhile it\u2019s very common to experience more than one emotion at a time, people with low self-awareness tend to only notice the biggest, loudest emotion happening.<\/p>\n