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1. You define yourself by your past.<\/strong> If you\u2019ve struggled with low self-esteem for much of your life, those beliefs and feelings of being less than others are what you know best. And so they feel very real. On the other hand, imagining your future self with higher self-esteem feels distant and unreal. But here\u2019s the thing\u2026<\/p>\n How you feel about yourself is not always a very good indicator of your true value.<\/p>\n People with\u00a0healthy self-esteem\u00a0know that just because they\u00a0feel\u00a0bad doesn\u2019t mean they\u00a0are\u00a0bad. They know that just because they\u2019ve been one way in the\u00a0past\u00a0says nothing about how they are destined to be in the\u00a0future. And they don\u2019t overprioritize their past selves at the expense of their future selves.<\/p>\n When you define yourself by your past, you give away control over your future.<\/p>\n 2. You procrastinate on your passions.<\/strong> Of course, we all\u00a0procrastinate. But people with low self-esteem often have a strange pattern to their procrastination: They get the mundane, everyday stuff done on time (paying the bills, finishing those weekly reports, etc.) but they procrastinate on the activities they care most about (creative hobbies, travel, learning, fitness, etc.). And the reason\u2026<\/p>\n When you have low self-esteem, you don\u2019t trust yourself with your most important goals.<\/p>\n On the other hand, people with healthy self-esteem trust themselves to\u00a0pursue their passions\u00a0even if it means failure, mistakes, or frustrations. They\u2019ve built up the confidence to go after the things that matter most to them despite the possibility of failure, embarrassment, or mistakes.<\/p>\n Healthy self-esteem means you define yourself by the pursuit of your passions, not the end results.<\/p>\n 3. You\u2019re hypercritical of others.<\/strong> Obviously, we all need to think critically sometimes. But there\u2019s a big difference between\u00a0thinking critically\u00a0and\u00a0being critical:<\/p>\n Helpful criticism is about making the world a better place. Unhelpful criticism is about making yourself feel better.<\/p>\n People with low self-esteem have a hard time feeling good about themselves. This means that they sometimes get in the habit of\u00a0criticizing others\u00a0as a way to make themselves look better in comparison. For example: when you criticize someone\u2019s opinion for being stupid, you\u2019re implying that you\u2019re smart\u2014and that feels good.<\/p>\n The trouble is that being critical of others as a way to boost your own self-esteem is only temporary. And after that, you usually end up feeling even worse about yourself.<\/p>\n If you tend to be overly critical of others, ask yourself this:<\/p>\n When I criticize other people, am I trying to be genuinely helpful or am I trying to make myself feel better?<\/p>\n 4. You\u2019re unwilling to enforce healthy boundaries.<\/strong> Most of us know that it\u2019s important to\u00a0set healthy boundaries, especially with difficult people in our lives. The trouble is, even if we set a healthy boundary, the hard part is enforcing it. And the reason\u2026<\/p>\n If you don\u2019t enforce boundaries, it\u2019s because you value other people more than yourself.<\/p>\n But here\u2019s the strange part: If you find yourself in this position\u2014not having enough self-respect to enforce your boundaries\u2014the best way to get it is to set and enforce healthy boundaries!<\/p>\n The trick is to start very small and work your way up. Work on returning that Starbucks drink they got wrong for a while then move your way up to saying no to your boss\u2019 request that you work weekends again.<\/p>\n When you enforce a healthy boundary, you reinforce the belief that you matter just as much as anyone else.<\/p>\n 5. You overthink minor decisions.<\/strong> Some decisions in life are hugely important and impactful\u2014whom you choose to marry, whether to try heroin or not, quitting your job to start your own business. These are big-time decisions with big-time consequences. And it\u2019s perfectly understandable for people to experience some mental back and forth between deciding.<\/p>\n But people with low self-esteem often treat even minor decisions as if the fate of the world rested on them.<\/p>\n This\u00a0indecisiveness\u00a0in even small decisions is often the result of low confidence in your own ability to make decisions. The key is to come to terms with the fact that you will make some bad decisions (or at least decisions that other people don\u2019t like) and that in the end, that\u2019s okay. Nobody dies if you choose pizza for dinner even though your family wanted Chinese.<\/p>\n Courage isn\u2019t the absence of fear. Courage is the belief that you\u2019ll be okay despite your fear.<\/p>\n 6. You rely on other people to feel better.<\/strong> When we feel bad, we want to feel better. When we\u2019re\u00a0worried, we want to know that things will turn out alright. When we\u2019re sad we want to feel happier and more energized. Unfortunately, many people get stuck in the habit of relying on other people\u2019s reassurances in order to feel better. This is a problem because\u2026.<\/p>\n Reliance on others for emotional support leads to emotional fragility in the long run.<\/p>\n Of course, we all benefit from the support of the people around us. But when you rely on it, you give up the opportunity to practice those essential skills for yourself. And the result is low confidence in your own ability to handle stressors and challenges. And eventually, low self-esteem.<\/p>\n There\u2019s nothing wrong with asking for support when you really need it. But it\u2019s unwise to rely on it.<\/p>\n 7. You struggle to take compliments.<\/strong> If compliments tend to make you uncomfortable and squeamish, it\u2019s likely a sign that you either don\u2019t think you deserve it or you\u2019re worried that other people will think badly of you if you do. But whether you don\u2019t respect yourself enough, or you respect other people\u2019s opinions too much, the end result is the same: low self-esteem.<\/p>\n Taking compliments well means a healthy respect for yourself and the opinions of others.<\/p>\n Luckily, taking compliments well is something you can practice and get better at. Instead of making excuses for yourself or downplaying your achievements, taking a compliment well is often as simple as smiling and saying \u201cthank you.\u201d And the more you practice, the more you\u2019ll start to believe that you are actually worthy of all those compliments you get.<\/p>\n A compliment accepted is a vote of confidence in yourself.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" 1. You define yourself by your past. Low self-esteem is often a failure of imagination. If you\u2019ve struggled with low self-esteem for much … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2121,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2120","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2120","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2120"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2120\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2122,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2120\/revisions\/2122"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2121"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2120"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2120"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tipsforahealthylife.eu\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2120"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nLow self-esteem is often a failure of imagination.<\/p>\n
\nWhen you avoid the things that matter most, it\u2019s often a sign that you don\u2019t trust yourself.<\/p>\n
\nBeing overly critical of others is usually a primitive strategy for boosting your own ego.<\/p>\n
\nBoundary-setting issues are usually self-respect issues in disguise.<\/p>\n
\nIndecision goes hand-in-hand with poor self-confidence.<\/p>\n
\nLow self-esteem frequently manifests as chronic reassurance-seeking.<\/p>\n
\nDifficulty taking compliments is often an indicator of low self-worth.<\/p>\n