1. They Keep You In The Friend Zone
“It really does hurt to only always be the friend and never the lover, not even the love interest.” — Anonymous
According to Wikipedia, the friend zone is a term used for the situation in which one person in a mutual friendship wishes to enter into a romantic or sexual relationship with the other person, while the other does not.
If a person is not that into you, they might put you in the friend zone.
They have decided you are just a friend and not a dating option. You become this complete non-sexual entity in their eyes, like a sibling or a plant.
They keep you around and will talk to you for hours whenever it is convenient for them. However, your friendship feels very one-sided because they are rarely available at the times when you need them.
And while there are merits to being friends with your crush, unrequited love breaks your heart more than it mends it.
Keeping you in the friend zone is an unfortunate sign that your partner or potential partner is not into you.
2. They Create And Leave You In Confusion
“Take time to be sure, but be sure not to take too much time.” — Anonymous.
When someone is into you, they will not give you mixed signals.
But when they are not, you will feel confused about how they really feel about you and it will seem like they are hot for you one moment, and completely cold towards you the next.
They might say things like;
“I am not ready for a relationship right now but I think I really like you.”
“I need to take some time off to really find myself.”
“It is not you, it is me.”
“I do not think a relationship between us would work right now because xyz.”
“I am afraid I am going to hurt you if I get into a relationship with you.”
If a potential partner is confused about how they feel about you, it might be a sign that they are not that into you. They are just keeping you around until a more suitable option comes along.
If you feel confused and are getting mixed signals, it is an unfortunate sign that your potential partner is not that into you.
3. They Keep You Completely Separate From Other Aspects Of Their Lives
I love meeting new people; I think everyone has a story to tell. — Kim Smith
Shasta Nelson, the author of “Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness,” suggests making those intros sooner rather than later.
“We bond more with our partners when we meet their friends,” she said, adding that a big party or group event can be more comfortable than a one-on-one interrogation with your best friend.
Nelson also stressed that it’s important for your friends to meet the person you’re dating even if you’re not serious.
You get to see how they act around other people and you get an opportunity to integrate your relationship with other parts of your life.
If your potential partner has not introduced you to even one friend, it could be that they are just not that into you.
4. They Cancel On Your Plans Together At The Last Moment
Stop making plans with people who always cancel on you. The only flakes you should up with are the ones in your cereal bowl. — Linda Jones
When someone is not really into you, they almost never initiate plans for the two of you.
And when you do make plans, they usually cancel your plans together.
This might be an indication that your potential partner is just not that into you.
Also, they most likely avoid committing to any future plans because they are not certain if you will be around that long.
It is an unfortunate sign that your partner might not be into you.
5. They Show Minimal Affection And Avoid Physical Contact
Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives. — C. S. Lewis
Love is a complicated subject, and it becomes even more complicated if the person you like is not showing clear signs of affection.
Sometimes, your object of affection is just shy and rarely touches you. It is not because they do not love you that might just be the way they are wired.
They might not like public displays of affection.
However, if they show you absolutely none or very little affection and avoid physical contact even when in private, they might just not be that into you. Humans are wired to need touch and physical affection.
6. They Constantly Talk About The Bright Past They Had Before You Came Along
“The grass is not green on the other side, it is green where it is watered.” — Justin Beiber
If the person you are into is always talking about how awesome the relationship with their ex was, it might be a red flag that they are not that into you.
Another warning sign that they are just not that into you is if they keep talking about other potential partners, and the qualities they like in them. This is especially alarming if these qualities do not even describe you.
If they are not that into you, they will not water the grass with you where you are.
Continuously referencing the past as having been better than the present might be an unfortunate sign that your potential partner is not that into you.
7. They Directly Express Their Lack Of Interest
Love does not need to be perfect. It just needs to be true. — Moosa Rahat
Sometimes, a potential partner will tell you directly that they are not interested in you or pursuing a relationship with you.
Other times, they will be subtle about it and tell you indirectly.
They will express the fact that they are just not that into you. Believe them either way, cut your losses and go where you are appreciated.
Even if they make an exception and you end up in a relationship, that love will not be true. They will leave you the moment someone else piques their interest.
Direct expression of lack of interest is an unfortunate but true sign that someone might not be into you.
8. They Intentionally Avoid Your Pursuits
Every heart sings a song, incomplete until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. — Plato
When someone is not into you, they will avoid your pursuits and act almost indifferent to your acts of love.
You might feel taken for granted, invalidated, and, at times, maybe not even human.
Nothing hurts more than knowing that if the world were ending in five minutes, they are the one person you would want to call. However, their phone would be busy because they would be on the line talking to someone else.
If your potential partner consistently avoids you, they are probably just not into you.
9. They Do Not Consider You A Priority
I hate when guys think I am playing hard to get. Dude, I really do not like you. I am not playing. — Lisa Karls
An unfortunate sign that someone is not into you is that they do not consider you or your needs a priority.
For example, they hardly call or return your calls. When you have text communication going on, their text replies will probably be blunt and terse.
They are likely to avoid you for days and respond intermittently when they do. Many times it feels like they are playing hard to get.
This person is probably just not that into you.
In some rare cases, a person might give you all these signs when they actually like you. The key to any successful relationship lies in open and honest communication with each other.
However, if it is the case that your potential partner is just not that into you, I empathize.
Unrequited love is unbearably painful. It hurts to realize that this person meant the world to you, but you mean nothing to them. The best thing to do is to move on to where you are appreciated.
Loving someone who does not love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it hurts.
Move on to where your heart will find a home. Where you will be loved for who you are and not for someone else’s convenience.
I wish loads and loads of love and mutual love in your relationships.